When Spirit Speaks Do U Listen
To reflect on good feeling memories is a choice. But so is reflecting on the stale ones...
Embracing memories of yesterday's past guides me to make peace w/my current reality. Back when I was collecting all this footage, I was clueless as to why. Emotionally, I felt empty. Back then, I was beginning a new career path & had 0 confidence. Everything (which is literally nothing 3 yrs later) weighed on me like a ton of bricks. So many people around me confused my particular ways as being spoiled, which inspired guilt w/in myself. Being a grown spoiled woman is like being called a diva. If you ain't Beyonce or Patti LaBelle, it's not a good look.
Because I was in such an ugly place emotionally, all of my nightmares were coming to life. My King was back in Miami for the long haul, due to legal bs. Our children were split up. All the pressure to not only keep myself & my children afloat, but keep my King encouraged was overwhelming me. I couldn't stop thinkin about shit related to cheating, our lack of affection & my tone-less, ugly body. And those were just my personal issues. Lack of resources weighed heaviest on me because I knew it was my time to serve my family. I felt like a failure before I officially began this journey.
With my King being on probation, suddenly all the pressure to provide was on me. No matter where I'm located, Chicago will always be in my heart. Chicago is rooted in turning a dollar into 15 cents. It's quite natural for us to turn nothing into something. However, it was nearly impossible for me to attract actual money. This is a part of the generational curse I'm breaking. Takin on all this was stressful af!
Plus my King & I have 5 babies between us. Including 3 little girls who mimic my behavior. If my vibes are low, so r theirs. If feminine vibes are low, the masculine vibe follows suite shortly thereafter. Before you know it, everyone is pissed with no official reasoning as to why. So, I'd settle for having regular blow ups w/my King & cursing myself in private for the whole exchange the whole way through. While outwardly playing Dr. SaveMe for everyone else. I'd forgive everyone else, while I lynched & hung myself. This was self abuse at it's worse. But it's the only way I knew to love myself.
Since 6.2.17, I've been facing myself & transmuting my feelings 2 emotions. Soo many things have changed since then. Now, I can see the magic I've always been engulfed in.
To establish peace, my King & I used to bring our babies to the beach regularly. We'd observe the environment, ask curious questions & get lost in the beautiful land of mystery the beach offered. Catching this crab in it's natural habitat explained myself to me better. Allow me to explain.
My North Node is in Cancer. Cancer is represented by the crab. The crab is in the water. The tides in the water is controlled by the moon. The moon represents feminine energy. Like the moon, women only reveal so much of themselves 2 the World. But keep a considerable amount covered.
Then on top of that, we catch a statue of Shango chillin by the waves. This footage was taken back in 7/15. Waaay before I knew anything about Orishas, who they are & what they do. My Babalao informed me this Summer that I was indeed a child of Oshun. Oshun is the Godis of the ocean. I still have quite a bit more to learn about the Orishas, their power & their children. Oshun is my gateway.
I get a kick from my whole journey. Crazy how certain signs will continue to follow u beggin u 2 pay attention. I had to learn how to cut off my thoughts & simply focus on my breath. That trained me to listen out for the voice of the divine. These days, I'm a meditation master, so the channelled messages come through nonstop. I hit my head countless times, focusing my energy in the small things life offers, instead of honoring the songs of my heart. Until now. But ay, when ya know better, ya do better, right!?
Our day ended focusing on Shango, my King & our 3 boys. These days, these men are goin through their own spiritual war. Because I recognize myself in their essence, I'm sharing my journey as a means of guidance.
When Spirit talks, do you listen!?
Here's a video offering insight on my intro to Godis-hood. Enjoy. If you find this video valuable, like, share, comment & let me know the tips that work best for you. Then, head over to our shop & load up on your spiritual products. I appreciate serving you all
Happy Healin Babes